Unconditional Love

Unconditional love

So many people seek relationships in which love is unconditional. But unconditional love only means that everyone should abandon responsibility and standards.

If love were unconditional then everyone would be in love with everyone - and therefore no one would be "in love." It's conditions that create love between two people.

Here's an example of unconditional love: "I love berate and criticize you and destroy your self-esteem...and still you love me."

Conditional love: "I treat you with respect and help you fulfill your potential as a human being...and you love me for it."

Conditions are good. If you're not setting conditions and your partner isn't setting conditions then you have an addictive, disfunctional and destructive relationship. True love happens when both people in the partnership accept and value the conditions they place upon one another.

A belief in conditional love is a sign of self-respect. It says "I have value as a person." And it says "I'm good enough to be loved by people who have standards."